Facing death with faith

Discipleship doesn’t stop with life—it prepares us for what’s next

Death is often a topic we avoid – even as believers with a deep-seated hope in eternal life who live with the hope of resurrection, a hope that transcends our earthly lives and points us to eternity. The Bible teaches that wisdom considers the swiftness of life, and part of that wisdom involves preparing thoughtfully for the end of our earthly story.

Recently, a member of our congregation was diagnosed with a terminal illness that rapidly progressed, and she went to be with Christ within a matter of weeks. A precious part of pastoral ministry is helping Christians prepare for death. But I never find this easy. Because in every death there is a broken heart, the pain of loss, and the anguish of separation.

However, the uncomfortable nature of this topic should not cause us to shy away from what is and should be a last and important part of our discipleship as a church.

During the weeks between diagnosis and death, I sought to help our church member prepare for death. And I was asked more than once, how exactly do you do that?

When I set out in ministry, I knew the outline of how to prepare a funeral service – but I wasn’t sure how to help believers who were dying prepare for death itself. I hope some of what follows may help others, in both pastoral and personal situations.

The hardest conversation

When someone has been diagnosed with a terminal illness, I will always continue to pray for their healing as long as they wish. But if they are not healed, and it is clear death is coming, then I need to have a conversation about preparing for death. To fail to do that, as difficult as it might be, is a neglect of pastoral ministry.

When Paul pens his final letter to Timothy, his spiritual son and co-worker, he is preparing for his own death. Second Timothy 4:6–13 are some of his final words, and they have given me a helpful framework in how, as believers, we can help prepare for death.

Recall the hope of the gospel

Paul accepts that his death is approaching. He died as a martyr for the gospel’s hope that through Christ we are reconciled to God, gifted eternal life, and raised in the resurrection when Christ returns. In this hope, he faces his death.

To prepare for death, it is vital to hold out the hope of the gospel as we reflect on and talk about our mortality, and, as we do, to hold onto what is to come in the promise of salvation through Jesus’ death for our sins, and his resurrection.

Holding out the gospel also reminds us of the reality that though death is often painful, Christ has suffered and, because of his suffering, we will be absent from the body and present with the Lord the moment we are called home.

Sharing communion

As he prepared to face his own death, Jesus shared Passover with his disciples and instituted the Lord’s Supper during it. The Lord’s Supper is a visible sign of God’s promise and a tangible seal of that promise to us. And it can be helpful when preparing people for death.

In sharing communion together, we hold out the gospel’s hope in death: “… that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures,” (1 Corinthians 15:4).

Prepare what you want to say

Knowing what is ahead, Paul wrote to Timothy about what he wanted him to hold on to – not to be ashamed, to remain strong, to show himself approved, to endure difficult times, and to fulfil his ministry. Paul has important encouragement to give.

Preparing believers for death is about helping people think through what they wish to leave behind. Words they want to say. Memories they wish to leave. These can be written and prepared at any point in life so that, in any event, you leave behind the words you wish to say. Don’t wait to do this one.

What needs forgiving?

Paul also asks Mark to come. Famously, Mark caused a dispute and tension between Paul and Barnabas when he deserted the mission field, and Barnabas wanted to bring him back. But now, Mark is useful. The man who once failed, deserted, and who Paul seemed to have had no time for, is now useful. There must have been forgiveness and reconciliation to bring them back together.

Preparing for death means asking this question: is there anyone you need to forgive or seek reconciliation with before you die? Of course, that may not always be possible. Some circumstances mean it cannot, or may not be appropriate, to happen.

Put your affairs in order

Paul asks for his cloak, scrolls, and parchments. Why did he want them? We don’t know. But knowing that his death was approaching, he seems to want to have final affirmations to put in order and know exactly where his possessions and items are. Practical questions need to be asked to help prepare believers for death: is a last will and testament in place? Do they have any affairs that need to be sorted out? Are there end-of-life decisions that need to be made in advance? Is there paperwork that needs to be given to people? Are there last requests for a funeral service?

Asking questions reduces uncertainty about final wishes and helps alleviate worries as death approaches.

Prayerful support

Finally, all our pastoral ministry is rooted in prayerfulness. When preparing a believer for death, we must pray with them. In prayer, we come with them to God, asking for his comfort, will, strength, and nearness.

And in the laying on of hands, we have a very human touch that can bring comfort, but also, as we see in Scripture, it is a means of conveying blessing and spiritual gifts to people from God, bringing both physical comfort and a deeper sense of God’s comfort through the Holy Spirit.

Pastoral ministry aims to make God and his gospel known so that believers experience the comfort of his grace, the hope of his salvation, and the strength that comes from faith in Christ. This is never more crucial than in preparing believers to face death.

 

This article first appeared in Direction Magazine. For further details, please click here.